Adele's Audition Song
I'll play the sweet farmer's daughter whom city boys lead to the slaughter.
I'm wearing a skirt way too short! My countrified laugh is a snort.
I'm just a gal who cain't say "nein", and I’ll fall fer any dumb line!
Though I'm dumb, I'm not blonde.
As I learned from the hicks, I wag my bum, my magic wand.
That's how we land ‘em in the sticks.
And when I've got the hook in good, he follows me into the wood.
Then once I've got that little ring,
I open wide and start to sing!
Such a razor wit, beauty that won't quit, can't be locked up inside a cage!
I'm so talented, I'll knock 'em dead! I've got to get on that stage!
When I play the empress, I strut in a purple dress.
I can "sweep", but I don't bake.
The folk? Ha! Let them all choke on cake!
My loyal subjects line up for half a mile.
Watch them weep as I sing away!
Over their lives I rule with a smile.
Queen, and not just for a day!
Such a razor wit, beauty that won't quit!
The sexy symbol of the age.
I'm so talented, I'll knock 'em dead!
I've got to get on that stage!
Now I'm a lady from Paree!
I'm married to an old marquis.
One day a nice young man appears.
He whispers things into my ears.
For two whole acts he gets the bird, but I surrender in the third.
And then in bursts my old marquis!
Oh my, what will become of me?
My dear old husband then drops dead!
That leaves me rich and free to wed.